I’ve been sleep walking lately but my doctor won’t let me count it as exercise.
I'm going to buy a racehorse and train him to run by himself. I think he'll be a lot faster without that guy on his back.
Posted 29 Oct
Considering how bad it smells, you’d think it would be a lot easier to find my WD40.
Posted 28 Oct
People say I'm not driven. Hearing that drives me to drink, which makes me funny, which makes me successful, which makes them wrong.
Posted 27 Oct
Lately I’ve been rereading the classics. I had totally forgotten that Miss November 1990 likes meeting new people.
Posted 24 Oct